LM - the rationale for #1 is obvious. For #2, do you have a particular project in mind? And are you trying to make the transition from PHP7 to PHP8 or from Python (in the past I thought you were mostly trying to bump up the Python skills).
My programming skills have become atrocious - not just outdated, but also forgot so much. But short of a big project that really motivates me, it's hard to just study. I do enjoy big projects with flexible deadlines (hard deadlines makes learning new things and stretching skills way too stressful).
Rupert - sorry to hear that. You've been around long enough that I know you have a good perspective, so I don't know if this will be helpful in any way, but here goes...
When I've felt that overwhleming loss of control, I have found setting very small goals and celebrating tiny victories to be helpful.
Though not currently, for very long periods (years at a time when feeling really out of control), I have set weekly goals and I always made some of them stupidly easy. Do the dishes. Kiss my wife. Go for one run, any distance, write one page, make one phone call related to X, etc. I found that being able to plan and rack up victories *helps*.
It doesn't *solve* a root problem. If you can't pay the bills or you were way too optimistic on deadlines, there's no cheap hack that makes that less stressful. Sometimes you have to just all out sprint. But all out sprints are not a long term strategy of course.
For those times when I feel like I'm treading water or running around trying to keep all the plates spinning and it's sort of working, but also making me crazy and feeling like I'm never going to come out the other end, the weekly goals do two things for me.
1. Give me some wins. Easy or not, I believe very much in taking the win. It's worth it to take a moment, too, to celebrate small victories. This might sound corny, but my wife and I actually have a little dance thing we do for often really trivial things. I find it helpful.
2. It limits me from thinking of everything that I have to do and focuses me on the things I will do this week. And when I finish everything on the list, the week is done. I have no other obligations. I can start working on something that is on the backburner, or I can just read a book or watch TV or go for a walk or run or whatever. My lists are comprehensive - work, health, friendships, etc. There have been weeks where I have had a run on the list and have found myself running at 11pm on Sunday night, but generally it builds space and slack into the week.
And BTW, only create weekly goals that you control. In other words...
Bad Goal: meet with Jim
Good Goal: call Jim to set up a meeting.
I have tried various incentive schemes too. Things like X dollars in a fun fund if I finish my list, minus 5X dollars if I don't. Or for more continuing goals, like your triathlon, I set up a "points" system where each point was worth a certain amount of money and I picked some thing I could not purchase until I had enough points (my current laptop and ski boots were "paid" for this way). So in your case, presumably you want to run, swim and bike. For me, I would do something like 1 point for running, 3 for biking and 6 for swimming, because if they were all 1 point or 6 points, I would just go running all the time and never swim.
Ultimately, I dropped my incentivized goals. Partly that was because I set the points to dollars conversion too high I was spending a shit ton of money! Theresa still uses that system though. She just cut the points to money ratio in half to get spending back in check.
Anyway, I understand that none of those things change the basics of money in and money out and the wild roller coaster of retail, but for me they help me focus on things I can control and help me make incremental progress even when my mind is screaming that I need to make giant leaps forward (which is just negative thought because giant leaps forward are just incremental advances stacked over the long term).
For me at least, if I think of the big picture too often, it just overwhelms me and seems impossible. The weekly goals let me think of the big picture once a week to pick my goals, then just focus on getting things done.
BTW... there's an analogy in climbing. I see a lot of climbers who are always thinking of whether or not to place more gear. I try to place gear I like, then look to where my next piece will go (obvious rest, obvious placement) and climb there without thinking. Then stop and reassess. The constant attention to gear, even after you've just placed some, slows climbers down and slowing down leads to more fatigue and often failure. This is the first time I've ever thought of that as a metaphor for life.
