This story has been shared millions of times and today I saw it for the third or forth or tenth time over the years. But it still makes me smile.
I love Vonnegut's essays (often more than his fiction). Around the house, my wife and I often quote him to pause and recognize something good, with his famous line: "If this isn't nice, I don't know what is" (from a graduation speech).
He has a story about how he is headed out the door and his wife asks where he is going. He says he is going to buy an envelope (one envelope). His wife tells him,
Quote"Well, you're not a poor man. Why don't you buy a thousand envelopes? They'll deliver them, and you can put them in the closet." And I say, "Hush."
Then he recounts all the things he sees and all the people he meets while buying an envelope. People buying lottery tickets. The Hindu woman with a jewel between her eyes. Then he waits in line at the postal convenience center which is like the United Nations (this is in New York). He says, "I'm secretly in love with the woman behind the counter. She doesn't know it. My wife knows it."
And finally, his errand is done.
QuoteAnd I go home. And I have had one hell of a good time. Electronic communities build nothing. You wind up with nothing. We are dancing animals. How beautiful it is to get up and go out and do something. We are here on Earth to fart around. Don't let anybody tell you any different.
I beg to differ on the question of electronic communities. I think I at least have wound up with something. Thank you all.
But I am a big fan of farting around and I'm not about to let anyone tell me any different.
This is from the book, A Man without a Country, chapter 6 ("I have been called a Luddite") and at least for me, Google has perniciously violated the Vonnegut/Stories Press copyright and made the whole story available here:https://books.google.com.bz/books?id=T7J-Xg2bYKAC&lpg=PR6&pg=PA55#v=onepage&q=envelope&f=false
You'll also see a shorter version attributed to an interview he gave, which is also true, but that's from the interview for the book tour and is a nice, but shorter version of the whole storyI recommend the published version which, again, seems to be freely available online to all freeloaders and copyright criminals out there.
And if that isn't nice, I don't know what is.